It's been over a month since I last blogged. Even the day after I wrote my last blog I was shown how life can change in an instant. But that's another blog for another day.
Tonight I put into perspective the fact that in just a week and a half, my original due date would be here. Yes I'm excitedly Angel Wongs of Love project is coming together so well and that I have , with God by my side, been able to help so many people. It's amazing!
But tonight I started to think of the what could have beens. Getting ready to go to the hospital any time now, all the kicks in my belly that would have happened, having a baby shower, preparing the nursery.. All the dreams and hopes and wishes...
I cried for myself. For my hurt. I haven't grieved the past few months and really felt I was making some leeway... Only to end up with wistful thinking and broken hopes .
I am forever grateful that our baby touched our lives for it's breif time that we knew it. I just wish I had been able to see them. Hold them in my arms.
It is my greatest comfort knowing the first thing our baby saw when it opened it's eyes was Jesus face. And one day we will see them standing with Him.
But for now... For tonight... I miss the what could have beens...
